Last night at 8:30 pm Thomas moved down to the 7th floor, room 7236.
He is getting better every day and his voice sounds great! He is getting physical therapy every day to help his motor skills and his coordination, dialysis 3 times a week to help his kidneys, and he is getting fluids taken out of his body 3-4 times a week.
I know everyone is more than relieved and more than happy to hear that Thomas is doing well. And i know i have said this before... but thank you so much to EVERY single person out there who has kept Thomas and my family in your thoughts and prayers. It has been amazing to witness such a miracle...don't you agree?
love you BRO.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
Sunday, February 22, 2009
This morning i brought my brother a strawberry lemonade from Starbuck's and he finished all of it! He ordered Frosted Mini Wheats this morning, but only had a couple bites. Thomas is still getting used to eating and doesn't really have an appetite. He also got his last Ribavirin treatment at 2 pm today!
My brother's voice has been getting better, but his throat can be irritating at times. Nonetheless, he has made so much progress this past weekend - i am impressed and very excited! He's also been drinking the Razzmatazz i got him. I made sure to get him an Immunity Boost.
=)
Thomas is allowed to drink fluids and eat food, but only in small amounts and he has to be sitting upright. It'll take awhile for his body to get accustomed to it because he hasn't eaten or drank anything by himself in about 3 weeks.
It's still a little hard for him to talk, but even whispering is much easier to understand than random hand gestures. He asked for a Sprite today and seemed satisfied even though the nurse only let him drink a quarter of it.
Overall, he looks fantastic, but is often tired. I am passing on everyone's messages to him as well.
My brother is a survivor!
It's still a little hard for him to talk, but even whispering is much easier to understand than random hand gestures. He asked for a Sprite today and seemed satisfied even though the nurse only let him drink a quarter of it.
Overall, he looks fantastic, but is often tired. I am passing on everyone's messages to him as well.
My brother is a survivor!
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Extubated!
The tube was taken out at about 10:30 this morning. He could only whisper at first but he is slowly getting his voice back. A speech therapist will be coming in to see when he can start eating and drinking.I just massaged his feet all morning and talked to him... he told me he was thinking about the Chris Brown/Rihanna thing all night. I'm so excited for his progress!
Friday, February 20, 2009
Thomas looks great! His eyes can focus better, and his motor skills have improved, due to the help of physical therapists.
I massaged his feet for awhile then i'd go talk to him, and he would wiggle his toes, which would be my cue to go and massage his feet some more. He also said "i love you" in sign language. When i handed him pen and paper, he wrote "can you get me my cell phone and laptop" and "sneak me a coke". haha my brother is so cute. He also frowned when i told him that Chris Brown beat the crap out of Rihanna.
i can't wait to see him tomorrow.
I massaged his feet for awhile then i'd go talk to him, and he would wiggle his toes, which would be my cue to go and massage his feet some more. He also said "i love you" in sign language. When i handed him pen and paper, he wrote "can you get me my cell phone and laptop" and "sneak me a coke". haha my brother is so cute. He also frowned when i told him that Chris Brown beat the crap out of Rihanna.
i can't wait to see him tomorrow.
Today they took out 5 kg of fluids from my brother's body. Heart rate is floating around 99, which is GREAT. He is still having a little trouble breathing so they can't take him off the ventilator just yet. They are hoping to take the tube out on Sunday, which is also the last day of his Ribavirin treatment (for his upper respiratory system).
He is sleeping pretty peacefully right now, so i asked if i should come back in an hour and he nodded.
i'll continue to keep you guys updated. Thanks again for all your support, comments, prayers, thoughts... every chance i get, i tell my brother about how much love he is getting from everyone!
He is sleeping pretty peacefully right now, so i asked if i should come back in an hour and he nodded.
i'll continue to keep you guys updated. Thanks again for all your support, comments, prayers, thoughts... every chance i get, i tell my brother about how much love he is getting from everyone!
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Doctors didn't find anything in the CT scans of his brain. There is no bacteria in his lungs or blood, no fever, and his heart is operating well. The only part of him that isn't doing well is his kidneys, but one of the doctors said that because he is young, his kidneys will recover gradually.
They have to do dialysis tonight and give him his Ribavirin treatment. The tube is still in him...i'm not sure when they are planning on taking it out. I think they want to flush out some fluids in his body first because there is too much. I am happy that he is getting better by the day, but wish they could remove the tube. He wrote on a piece of paper today that he wanted coke and water, but he can't have that until they take the tube out. =( my heart goes out to my brother... i can't even begin to imagine the pain he has endured thus far.
i miss him. i hope the tube is out by the time i see him again.
They have to do dialysis tonight and give him his Ribavirin treatment. The tube is still in him...i'm not sure when they are planning on taking it out. I think they want to flush out some fluids in his body first because there is too much. I am happy that he is getting better by the day, but wish they could remove the tube. He wrote on a piece of paper today that he wanted coke and water, but he can't have that until they take the tube out. =( my heart goes out to my brother... i can't even begin to imagine the pain he has endured thus far.
i miss him. i hope the tube is out by the time i see him again.
I just talked to my brother's nurse and he's gonna get dialysis done this morning...and they still don't know if they are taking the tube out today or not. If it is today, it wouldn't be till later in the afternoon anyway. The pulmonary doctors are still making their decision.
And a lot of people have been asking if it's okay to visit him now. I asked my mom yesterday if Thomas could have visitors and she is taking major precautions and saying no. =( I know it's hard to not be able to see him or hear his voice, but it is probably for the best. I apologize! I have been passing on all your messages and comments, so he knows he has a lot of support out there.
Thomas is gonna be okay! =)
And a lot of people have been asking if it's okay to visit him now. I asked my mom yesterday if Thomas could have visitors and she is taking major precautions and saying no. =( I know it's hard to not be able to see him or hear his voice, but it is probably for the best. I apologize! I have been passing on all your messages and comments, so he knows he has a lot of support out there.
Thomas is gonna be okay! =)
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
I wish they could take the tube out sooner...i think they might have to do it tomorrow. He has been responsive, but it's absolutely frustrating for him to not get across what he wants to say. He motioned for me to rub his feet, flip the towel over on his forehead, etc. He tried to write using pen and paper i gave him but his motor skills are still not all there so i couldn't read what he wrote. It's really hard to not be able to communicate. I wrote down all the letters of the alphabet, and told him to squeeze my hand when i got to the right letter. Then he spelled "s-t-a-r b-e-e y-" and... yea - no idea what that says. The nurse says he is still loopy from some of the sedation meds so he might not really know what he's saying. He kept wanting to crack his knuckles, too (he would, huh?)...so i put up my hand so he could have something to push against, but he wasn't really able to push hard enough for any of his knuckles to crack.
I was really hoping they could take it out today so we could have had a conversation...but at least everything seems pretty normal. Same stuff as before - no fever, normal blood pressure, heart rate at 120. I'm satisfied but looking forward to more improvement.
I was really hoping they could take it out today so we could have had a conversation...but at least everything seems pretty normal. Same stuff as before - no fever, normal blood pressure, heart rate at 120. I'm satisfied but looking forward to more improvement.
Monday, February 16, 2009
When i left the hospital tonight, my brother's temperature and blood pressure were normal. Heart rate still at 120 ish. If he passes the breathing test tomorrow, they will remove the tube from out of his mouth! I'm praying that the tube will be removed before i fly back to la tomorrow afternoon so we can talk. it seems like years since i've talked to my brother.... At least things are lookin' up. Praise the Lord!
Numbers are still the same - no fever, heart rate around 125, and normal blood pressure. =)
He's been more restless lately and i KNOW that tube in his mouth is bothering the crap out of him...i can tell he's in pain when he does this thing with his eyebrows. Today I played some music for him, and he motioned with his fingers that he wanted to use the computer. I went on his facebook and showed him pictures from his 25th birthday party...then he motioned that he wanted pen and paper to tell me something. But he has limited motor function because of the sedation, and it just came out to be a bunch of scribbles that i couldn't interpret.
They are doing the Ribavirin treatment right now, so i won't get to see him till after 5 pm.
He's been more restless lately and i KNOW that tube in his mouth is bothering the crap out of him...i can tell he's in pain when he does this thing with his eyebrows. Today I played some music for him, and he motioned with his fingers that he wanted to use the computer. I went on his facebook and showed him pictures from his 25th birthday party...then he motioned that he wanted pen and paper to tell me something. But he has limited motor function because of the sedation, and it just came out to be a bunch of scribbles that i couldn't interpret.
They are doing the Ribavirin treatment right now, so i won't get to see him till after 5 pm.
No fever, heart rate is wavering around 120, and he has normal blood pressure. I just feel so bad for him because i know that tube in his mouth is bothering him. I know he's uncomfortable, and it sucks because there's nothing i can do about it. He kept trying to pull it out earlier, so they tied his arms to the bed. He motioned that he wanted me to pull it out for him, but i just kept saying that it was best that we left that tube in his mouth so he could get better faster. man, i really miss my brother. i hope he sleeps comfortably.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
I wish my bro was able to watch the All Star game with me. They just interviewed Dwyane Wade and i know my bro would have loved to watch that. He would have put on his D Wade shoes JUST for this game.
Anyway, he is still generally in the same condition. Fever is down, but his temperature still fluctuates, so we will see.
Anyway, he is still generally in the same condition. Fever is down, but his temperature still fluctuates, so we will see.
Thomas has been pretty responsive. He turned his head towards me when i said his name yesterday, and i think i made him laugh too. Well, he couldn't really laugh because there's a tube inside his mouth, but his mouth was moving a lot. My dad said to him, "When you get out, you can watch the Seahawks, Mariners, and Sonics!" I said, "..Dad.......there is no more Sonics", and Thomas definitely responded to that - there was a lot of mouth movement.
Last night his fever was at 100.8, so Damon, his nurse, gave him some tylenol and other antibiotics. At 2pm, they are going to give him Ribavirin, which will treat his respiratory virus. It's very hazardous so we are not allowed to go in until 4:30 pm.
Thanks again for all your calls and messages concerning Thomas. I know it must be hard to not be able to visit him, but the best thing we can do is to pray for him and keep him in our thoughts.
Last night his fever was at 100.8, so Damon, his nurse, gave him some tylenol and other antibiotics. At 2pm, they are going to give him Ribavirin, which will treat his respiratory virus. It's very hazardous so we are not allowed to go in until 4:30 pm.
Thanks again for all your calls and messages concerning Thomas. I know it must be hard to not be able to visit him, but the best thing we can do is to pray for him and keep him in our thoughts.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Thursday, February 12, 2009
I'm kind of confused about what my parents just told me...i didn't really understand what they were saying.
I guess the latest news is that my brother has a viral infection in his upper respiratory system so at 10pm they gave him something that will treat it. My brother is now in complete isolation so whoever goes in must wear a mask, gown, and gloves, including the nurses. One of the doctors is sick, and he thinks he got something from Thomas.
I will keep you guys posted!
I guess the latest news is that my brother has a viral infection in his upper respiratory system so at 10pm they gave him something that will treat it. My brother is now in complete isolation so whoever goes in must wear a mask, gown, and gloves, including the nurses. One of the doctors is sick, and he thinks he got something from Thomas.
I will keep you guys posted!
Some good news
At around 1:30 pm today, i found out that the doctors found a bacteria called Gran positive cocci in his blood stream, but that it was very common, and treatable.
At 2 pm, my parents had a meeting with the doctor and here is the latest news on why he may still be having fevers:
The good news is that they have located some bacteria that can be treated, that he doesn't have an infection in his lungs, and that he is relying on less oxygen (40%). His kidneys, however, aren't functioning as they would like them to, and that may be due to his low blood pressure.
So now it's just a matter of more waiting.
KEEP PRAYING!!
At 2 pm, my parents had a meeting with the doctor and here is the latest news on why he may still be having fevers:
- They found some bacteria in his colon, and last night they started giving him antibiotics specificially for that, and if that is what's causing the fevers, we should expect to see results in 24-48 hours.
- There is a digestive enzyme inside the gall bladder that may be infected, and it could migrate into the liver, but i think they are going to wait to see if he gets better from the antibiotics for his colon before they treat this.
- There is a possibility that there is bacteria growing in the peripheral lining of all the tubes in his body.
The good news is that they have located some bacteria that can be treated, that he doesn't have an infection in his lungs, and that he is relying on less oxygen (40%). His kidneys, however, aren't functioning as they would like them to, and that may be due to his low blood pressure.
So now it's just a matter of more waiting.
KEEP PRAYING!!
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
I don't why the previous post isn't showing up...you can read it if you highlight it though.
I just got word from my parents that they havent found any bacteria in the blood tests from his lungs, and they also couldn't find any in his scans. That's good news, but now it's just a matter of finding out why he keeps getting fevers.
I just got word from my parents that they havent found any bacteria in the blood tests from his lungs, and they also couldn't find any in his scans. That's good news, but now it's just a matter of finding out why he keeps getting fevers.
My mom has just asked that no one visit Thomas anymore, at least until he starts showing some improvement. He is still in very critical condition and she is afraid that there might be bacteria or germs coming in his room from outside sources.
Blood was drawn from his lungs today...so we are just basically waiting for test results of that, and of the scans. We should get official results of the scans by tonight I think.
So now its just more waiting and waiting...
Thanks to everyone who wanted to visit him - it's the thought that counts
Blood was drawn from his lungs today...so we are just basically waiting for test results of that, and of the scans. We should get official results of the scans by tonight I think.
So now its just more waiting and waiting...
Thanks to everyone who wanted to visit him - it's the thought that counts
im not ok - the dream
I listen to this song and think of my brother. I was listening to it on my flight this morning. Go ahead and press the play button.
At around 9 am, my brother's heart rate was at 141; it was at 141 for most of the night. The radiologists took a look at the scans this morning and didn't see anything that may be causing my brother to keep getting these fevers, but i think they will take a closer look at it again later.
Scan results could be in by tomorrow morning at the earliest, says the nurse. And dialysis will be going on for another hour or so.
God is our rock - let us not lose faith.
Thank you again to everyone who has been keeping Thomas and my family in your thoughts and prayers.
The calendar in the family room here on the 8th floor reads, "Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much. - Helen Keller". I encourage all of you, whenever gathered together in groups small or large, to pray for my brother and his health, and to pray for peace within his heart.
If there are any developments in the next three and a half hours while i'm still here, i'll let yall know. Sleep tight everyone.
God is our rock - let us not lose faith.
Thank you again to everyone who has been keeping Thomas and my family in your thoughts and prayers.
The calendar in the family room here on the 8th floor reads, "Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much. - Helen Keller". I encourage all of you, whenever gathered together in groups small or large, to pray for my brother and his health, and to pray for peace within his heart.
If there are any developments in the next three and a half hours while i'm still here, i'll let yall know. Sleep tight everyone.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Thomas: your visitors today included Judy, your high school choir director, Mike Ravenscroft and his brother Dave, who shares a very inspiring story, Shirin, Kaycee (sorry if i spelled your name wrong), Cara (Thomas' secret lover), Chris, Karissa, and my friends Minda, Yolanda, and Jason.
The nurse gave him Tylenol to lower his temperature and bring down his heart rate. They don't know why he keeps getting a fever though, so they just put contrast in him. Contrast helps with the body scans by making it more apparent what's going on inside his body and it may help them find the source of infection..
My bro has also been moving his arms a lot and opening his eyes just a little bit even though we're only seeing the white part of his eyeballs. He looks GREAT though. His color is back and he's tan again! And he looks peaceful. I love his toes...i can't stop playing with them.
I will post an update if the results for the scans or blood tests come in.
In the meantime...I will be gone tomorrow morning till Saturday morning for school... so make sure to realllllly visit him during these next few days! My brother loves you guys :)
The nurse gave him Tylenol to lower his temperature and bring down his heart rate. They don't know why he keeps getting a fever though, so they just put contrast in him. Contrast helps with the body scans by making it more apparent what's going on inside his body and it may help them find the source of infection..
My bro has also been moving his arms a lot and opening his eyes just a little bit even though we're only seeing the white part of his eyeballs. He looks GREAT though. His color is back and he's tan again! And he looks peaceful. I love his toes...i can't stop playing with them.
I will post an update if the results for the scans or blood tests come in.
In the meantime...I will be gone tomorrow morning till Saturday morning for school... so make sure to realllllly visit him during these next few days! My brother loves you guys :)
His numbers keep fluctuating. Heart rate and temperature are way up. 155 and 101.8.
They are gonna do scans of his entire body in a little bit, and see if they can figure out what's wrong...
In other news, a one-way ticket to fly back to LA tomorrow morning went up to $170. A couple days ago it was only $60...but i was unsure if i was gonna leave on Wednesday, depending on my brother's progress. Ahhhh now i dont know what to do!
They are gonna do scans of his entire body in a little bit, and see if they can figure out what's wrong...
In other news, a one-way ticket to fly back to LA tomorrow morning went up to $170. A couple days ago it was only $60...but i was unsure if i was gonna leave on Wednesday, depending on my brother's progress. Ahhhh now i dont know what to do!
About 6 doctors came in this morning to discuss Thomas' situation. He seems to be doing better than this weekend. His fever is down and his heart rate is at 135-ish. We asked him to wiggle his right foot and he did. Same with the left foot. I think he can hear us now even though he is on the same amount of sedation as he was before. WBC count is up, and it seems they haven't seen any leukemia cells.
Fever went down from 102.4 to 99.8. Heart rate is at 126 and seems to be steadily going down. I just saw a lot of arm movement..Thomas lifted both his arms and kind of moved them around, and his head also went from side to side. The nurses said it was okay - they want to see some movement, and he is still heavily sedated.
I'm gonna say good night to my brother then go to bed... sleeping in Thomas' room again tonight.
And thank you all for your positive, encouraging comments. I read all of them and your support means a lot to my family and me. Thomas is lucky to have such great friends =)
Night!
I'm gonna say good night to my brother then go to bed... sleeping in Thomas' room again tonight.
And thank you all for your positive, encouraging comments. I read all of them and your support means a lot to my family and me. Thomas is lucky to have such great friends =)
Night!
Monday, February 9, 2009
The doctors gave my brother Cortisol on Friday and Saturday as a last resort for him to get better so that's why his numbers were improving these past couple days. However, Cortisol can damage the body if there's too much of it...so they stopped giving it to him, and today his numbers went back up - not a good thing.
His temperature went up to 102.6 and his heart rate up to 161. The nurses gave him tylenol a couple hours ago and now his heart rate is wavering around 153. His temperature remains the same.
Mary's Dad, two other brothers from church, Dennis, Richard, and Ann came and we just had a group prayer, including my Dad.
Now it's just gonna be more waiting. The doctors have already given him all the antibiotics possible, so they can't give him anything else. We will just see what happens and I will keep everyone updated.
I miss my brother so much.
His temperature went up to 102.6 and his heart rate up to 161. The nurses gave him tylenol a couple hours ago and now his heart rate is wavering around 153. His temperature remains the same.
Mary's Dad, two other brothers from church, Dennis, Richard, and Ann came and we just had a group prayer, including my Dad.
Now it's just gonna be more waiting. The doctors have already given him all the antibiotics possible, so they can't give him anything else. We will just see what happens and I will keep everyone updated.
I miss my brother so much.
I think i forgot to mention that they put him back on sedation. Sorry bout that! So right now my brother is heavily sedated again.
The nurse drew some blood to see if there is any bacteria in it. It normally takes at least 24 hours for any cultures to grow, so we may find out tomorrow evening at the earliest.
They stopped drawing fluids from him because of his heart rate and low blood pressure, but will continue to do dialysis for about 3 hours.
The nurse drew some blood to see if there is any bacteria in it. It normally takes at least 24 hours for any cultures to grow, so we may find out tomorrow evening at the earliest.
They stopped drawing fluids from him because of his heart rate and low blood pressure, but will continue to do dialysis for about 3 hours.
February 9, 2009 update
I decided not to go back to school today. I'll probably go back Wednesday morning...I think. Depends on how my brother is doing.
Today his temperature went up to 99.8 - which is a fever for him, because he's on alot of meds to make him colder. His heart rate has also gone up to about 133, and his blood pressure got lower. But my mom spoke to the doctor this morning and he said that Thomas was doing alot better than Saturday though..
I'm so worried. Trying hard to let the Lord take care of things...
Today his temperature went up to 99.8 - which is a fever for him, because he's on alot of meds to make him colder. His heart rate has also gone up to about 133, and his blood pressure got lower. But my mom spoke to the doctor this morning and he said that Thomas was doing alot better than Saturday though..
I'm so worried. Trying hard to let the Lord take care of things...
Sunday, February 8, 2009
No response yet
Thomas has been off his sedation meds for about 13 hours but still remains unresponsive.
Otherwise he is doing fine & stable, but again - very very sick.
Today's visitors included Shirin, Lauren, Ann, David, Gary, Connie, Cara, Shirley, Jason, Yoshi, Joe, Ann's parents, and some Asian ladies i don't know (as is usually the case).
It was good reminiscing about things Thomas did back in the day, or even not that long ago... Being a badass on the baseball team in middle school, making 12 cds for his Montana roadtrip that everyone HAD to listen to in order (and each person was allowed one "skip"), how he used to work at Subway with a weirdo who shall be unnamed, his Spice Girls craze, etc.
Anyway, it's awesome seeing how much support Thomas is getting. Thank you all for your calls, messages, IMs, thoughts, prayers, visits, flowers, stuffed animals, food - Thomas is going to get through this...He is my rock, my TWIN, my second heartbeat...he HAS to pull through.
I'm gonna sleep in his room tonight. Apparently that big chair in the back folds out into a bed and sleeping next to him will make me feel better. Text me or call if you have any questions on how he is doing. I am happy to answer anything.
Otherwise he is doing fine & stable, but again - very very sick.
Today's visitors included Shirin, Lauren, Ann, David, Gary, Connie, Cara, Shirley, Jason, Yoshi, Joe, Ann's parents, and some Asian ladies i don't know (as is usually the case).
It was good reminiscing about things Thomas did back in the day, or even not that long ago... Being a badass on the baseball team in middle school, making 12 cds for his Montana roadtrip that everyone HAD to listen to in order (and each person was allowed one "skip"), how he used to work at Subway with a weirdo who shall be unnamed, his Spice Girls craze, etc.
Anyway, it's awesome seeing how much support Thomas is getting. Thank you all for your calls, messages, IMs, thoughts, prayers, visits, flowers, stuffed animals, food - Thomas is going to get through this...He is my rock, my TWIN, my second heartbeat...he HAS to pull through.
I'm gonna sleep in his room tonight. Apparently that big chair in the back folds out into a bed and sleeping next to him will make me feel better. Text me or call if you have any questions on how he is doing. I am happy to answer anything.
They took him off sedation this morning so we can see if he responds to us or follows our directions - whether he can move his hands, look at us directly, etc. This is just to see how his brain is functioning right now... they believe it is fine, but we just want to see some sort of reflexes right now.
I've been trying to talk to him for the past several hours and i've been playing music for him. I made a playlist for him last night of all his favorite songs and songs we used to listen to together so hopefully he can hear 'em. So far he's blinked a couple times, but he is still slowly getting off the sedation meds so it might take awhile for him to have any type of response.
I've been trying to talk to him for the past several hours and i've been playing music for him. I made a playlist for him last night of all his favorite songs and songs we used to listen to together so hopefully he can hear 'em. So far he's blinked a couple times, but he is still slowly getting off the sedation meds so it might take awhile for him to have any type of response.
Sunday, February 8
I got some sleep and had a dream that my brother's hand was responding to my talking to him.
Anyhow, his temperature has remained stable, his blood pressure is normal off just one medication, and his WBC count is up slightly. So he is doing sliiiiiiiiightly better than last night.
Anyhow, his temperature has remained stable, his blood pressure is normal off just one medication, and his WBC count is up slightly. So he is doing sliiiiiiiiightly better than last night.
one less medication
My bro is off another blood pressure medication and is doing fine with just one. Praise the Lord. Everything else seems stable - he is not getting any worse.
And instead of 50 cc, they are taking out 100 cc of fluids every hour. They're not gonna take out more than that.
I guess I'm gonna stay in his room and read Reader's Digest for a little then try and get some sleep...
And instead of 50 cc, they are taking out 100 cc of fluids every hour. They're not gonna take out more than that.
I guess I'm gonna stay in his room and read Reader's Digest for a little then try and get some sleep...
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Now my brother's heart rate is down to 117, which is GREAT, seeing as how it was 156 when he entered the hospital on Tuesday. His fever is down to 98.9 BUT his nurse says it fluctuates so it's not necessarily a GOOD sign.
I've had "Tattoo" on repeat in his room for like 3 hours. I wonder if he's sick of this song yet...? I'm also wearing the Jordan shorts i bought for him over break. Hope he's not mad about that.
Seeing my other family (Shirley, Brian, Jason, Mikey, Rex, Lily, and Andy) made me really happy today. It was a good escape from the situation and kind of just took my mind off things. I'm so grateful for all of them :) love you guys. My dad, of course, talked to them about Chinese food - his favorite topic.
I've had "Tattoo" on repeat in his room for like 3 hours. I wonder if he's sick of this song yet...? I'm also wearing the Jordan shorts i bought for him over break. Hope he's not mad about that.
Seeing my other family (Shirley, Brian, Jason, Mikey, Rex, Lily, and Andy) made me really happy today. It was a good escape from the situation and kind of just took my mind off things. I'm so grateful for all of them :) love you guys. My dad, of course, talked to them about Chinese food - his favorite topic.
Anyway, i'm sitting with my brother now .. he looks so peaceful, but at the same time, it's really painful for me (and everyone else) to see him like this..all we can do is pray and have faith. i wonder if he can hear me - i have so much to tell him...about how embarrassing Mom and Dad are, about everyone who has been visiting him and rooting for him, about school, my friends, how much i love Seattle, how i couldn't ask for a better brother, .. EVERYTHING. i miss my brother a lot.
keep praying. WE TRUST IN HIM.
Right now i'm just waiting for Shirley, Brian, Andy, Jason, Rex and Lily to come.
Sitting next to my brother and playing his favorite songs and OUR song - Jordin Sparks - "Tattoo"
Conversation from over winter break:
"hey guh, when i hear this song i think of you.. especially that line - 'you're on my heart just like a tattoo'"
"that should be OUR SONG"
so here i am playing our song for him. i hope he hears it.
Sitting next to my brother and playing his favorite songs and OUR song - Jordin Sparks - "Tattoo"
Conversation from over winter break:
"hey guh, when i hear this song i think of you.. especially that line - 'you're on my heart just like a tattoo'"
"that should be OUR SONG"
so here i am playing our song for him. i hope he hears it.
They are going to take 50 cc of fluids out of his entire body each hour - and that will include fluids from his lungs. His kidneys are functioning normally due to help from...something. some machine. and he is receiving less help from the ventilator but still heavily relying on it to breathe normally. He is also only relying on only two medications for his blood pressure rather than three.
KEEP PRAYING.
KEEP PRAYING.
Lung, Kidney, and Infectious Diseases doctors
All three of these doctors just talked to us about his current situation...
There are alot of fluids in his lungs right now, and they can't start the kidney dialysis until they get rid of some of those fluids. My brother is really swollen right now because he is taking in fluids but they aren't leaving his body at the same rate...
The Infecious Diseases doctor told us that there are some good signs..his fever is coming down a little bit, but his blood pressure is still pretty low at about 88/60. Normal blood pressure is 100-120/60-70.
So we are just waiting to see what happens..
There are alot of fluids in his lungs right now, and they can't start the kidney dialysis until they get rid of some of those fluids. My brother is really swollen right now because he is taking in fluids but they aren't leaving his body at the same rate...
The Infecious Diseases doctor told us that there are some good signs..his fever is coming down a little bit, but his blood pressure is still pretty low at about 88/60. Normal blood pressure is 100-120/60-70.
So we are just waiting to see what happens..
..it's only February 7th?
It seems like I've been here for weeks.
I woke up maybe an hour ago.. my mom has been checking on my bro, and I went to go visit him too. Praise the Lord, my brother is still with us. I'm always too scared to ask the nurse what's going on, only cuz i've heard the worst news possible. THE WORST news.
i'm scared..i dont know what's going to happen. i'm just really really scared right now..
and i miss my brother.
this is a terrible nightmare that i want to wake up from.
I woke up maybe an hour ago.. my mom has been checking on my bro, and I went to go visit him too. Praise the Lord, my brother is still with us. I'm always too scared to ask the nurse what's going on, only cuz i've heard the worst news possible. THE WORST news.
i'm scared..i dont know what's going to happen. i'm just really really scared right now..
and i miss my brother.
this is a terrible nightmare that i want to wake up from.
Today has been soooooo long and sooooo tiring. Just running on 4 hours of sleep along with all that crying is really draining.
After i heard what the doctors said, i sent a mass text to his friends and about thirty of them showed up within an hour...it was amazing to see how many solid friendships my brother had, and that wasn't even half of them.. my brother is truly amazing. In the words of Nicole's mom, "Thomas could make a friend out of.. a ROCK"
Right now Thomas is doing slightly better. His fever is gone. PRAISE THE LAWD! And everything is just a little better. But he is still very very very very sick and in very critical condition. Tonight they injected him with something that will improve his immune system, and they will continue to do it once every night.
I am still holding onto whatever hope i have left. It just wouldn't be right if Thomas wasn't here. But man... i really miss him. Even right now. I haven't talked to him since Monday night and I would do anything just to hear his voice again.
After i heard what the doctors said, i sent a mass text to his friends and about thirty of them showed up within an hour...it was amazing to see how many solid friendships my brother had, and that wasn't even half of them.. my brother is truly amazing. In the words of Nicole's mom, "Thomas could make a friend out of.. a ROCK"
Right now Thomas is doing slightly better. His fever is gone. PRAISE THE LAWD! And everything is just a little better. But he is still very very very very sick and in very critical condition. Tonight they injected him with something that will improve his immune system, and they will continue to do it once every night.
I am still holding onto whatever hope i have left. It just wouldn't be right if Thomas wasn't here. But man... i really miss him. Even right now. I haven't talked to him since Monday night and I would do anything just to hear his voice again.
Friday, February 6, 2009
latest update:
i fell asleep on the couch at 5 or so, woke up at 5:30 to the head doctor telling my parents that my brother would not survive the infection.
there is no word in the dictionary that can describe how i felt...my heart sunk to the ground and i felt HOPELESS. i still do.
i dont know what to think now. just trying SO HARD to give it all to God - seeing what His plans are for Thomas.
i fell asleep on the couch at 5 or so, woke up at 5:30 to the head doctor telling my parents that my brother would not survive the infection.
there is no word in the dictionary that can describe how i felt...my heart sunk to the ground and i felt HOPELESS. i still do.
i dont know what to think now. just trying SO HARD to give it all to God - seeing what His plans are for Thomas.
February 6, 2009 update
Let me first start off by saying a big THANK YOU to all for your support, faith, prayers, wishes - it all means alot and is helpful throughout this entire ordeal.
On February 3rd, 2009, Thomas' 25th birthday, he woke up feeling cold and asked our mom to turn up the heat to 80 degrees. He then proceeded to take a 20-30 minute shower to try and warm himself up, took his own temperature afterwards. He realized he had a fever, so he and our mom went to the UW hospital.
Because his immune system is shot from the chemotherapy, he was most likely exposed to some bacteria that would not have affected your average person. My brother, in addition to a malfunctioning immune system, had a 104 degree fever, low blood pressure, and he wasn't producing any white blood cells.
I wasn't able to get in touch with him since the morning of his birthday... but was reassured by my parents that he was okay. The news I heard from my parents got progressively worse in the next couple days. Hearing from them that he was being fed through a feeding tube, being given oxygen from an oxygen mask, hooked up to like 7 different IVs...let me tell you - it was painful, but nothing compared to what i was gonna feel later.
On February 5th, my Dad's birthday, i got a text during my review session at 4:45 in the afternoon from Brice, our childhood friend and neighbor. It read: "The doctor just said the chance of him surviving is very very slim, he's still talking to your dad, im so sorry grace".
...
...
......COMPLETLEY unexpected and unfathomable.
Can you imagine what i felt at that moment? It felt like someone had ripped out my heart, stabbed it repeatedly, threw it on the ground, and.. i dont even know what else... I honestly felt lifeless - like i couldn't go on. I didn't wanna call my dad because my dad probably felt the same thing...
So I left my review session, went back to the crib, and Richard's mom helped book a flight that night. I "packed" quickly - just my North Face backpack with a pair of sweats and socks, and my laptop. I was a complete mess... a HOT GHETTO MESS.
I was fidgeting and crying while He'ry and i were stuck in traffic on the way to the airport. I caught the earlier flight...this flight has had to be the most agonizing flight i have ever taken in my life. Crazy thoughts were going through my head..i had NO idea what was happening to my brother at that moment. It was frightening to not know at all what was going on.
You know what i really want right now?? i just want for my brother to talk back to me. i just want to see some LIFE in him. I want him to respond to me, to make fun of me, to tell me i'm embarrassing. He has been heavily sedated for the past several days ..the wait is long and painful.. but seeing him is even more painful. I wonder if he's dreaming happy things. I wonder if he's dreaming about me? I don't even know.
So i flew in last night and got to the hospital at about 11 pm...first person i went to see was my brother. Couldn't help it - cried my eyes out when i saw him, cried even harder when the nurse said that we were "looking at a tough situation".
I paced around the floor, reminiscing about my brother and I taking laps around the 7th floor when he was there for leukemia. Then after i had left for school, he would call me and cry on the phone wishing i was there.. but last night i was the one pacing around the floor crying - wondering what would happen in the following days. i would take a lap, stop at my brother's room, then start crying. it was too painful to see my brother like that.
So here i am..waiting waiting waiting.. i wish i KNEW what was gonna happen... i just want to hear the words "improvement" or "normal blood pressure".
On February 3rd, 2009, Thomas' 25th birthday, he woke up feeling cold and asked our mom to turn up the heat to 80 degrees. He then proceeded to take a 20-30 minute shower to try and warm himself up, took his own temperature afterwards. He realized he had a fever, so he and our mom went to the UW hospital.
Because his immune system is shot from the chemotherapy, he was most likely exposed to some bacteria that would not have affected your average person. My brother, in addition to a malfunctioning immune system, had a 104 degree fever, low blood pressure, and he wasn't producing any white blood cells.
I wasn't able to get in touch with him since the morning of his birthday... but was reassured by my parents that he was okay. The news I heard from my parents got progressively worse in the next couple days. Hearing from them that he was being fed through a feeding tube, being given oxygen from an oxygen mask, hooked up to like 7 different IVs...let me tell you - it was painful, but nothing compared to what i was gonna feel later.
On February 5th, my Dad's birthday, i got a text during my review session at 4:45 in the afternoon from Brice, our childhood friend and neighbor. It read: "The doctor just said the chance of him surviving is very very slim, he's still talking to your dad, im so sorry grace".
...
...
......COMPLETLEY unexpected and unfathomable.
Can you imagine what i felt at that moment? It felt like someone had ripped out my heart, stabbed it repeatedly, threw it on the ground, and.. i dont even know what else... I honestly felt lifeless - like i couldn't go on. I didn't wanna call my dad because my dad probably felt the same thing...
So I left my review session, went back to the crib, and Richard's mom helped book a flight that night. I "packed" quickly - just my North Face backpack with a pair of sweats and socks, and my laptop. I was a complete mess... a HOT GHETTO MESS.
I was fidgeting and crying while He'ry and i were stuck in traffic on the way to the airport. I caught the earlier flight...this flight has had to be the most agonizing flight i have ever taken in my life. Crazy thoughts were going through my head..i had NO idea what was happening to my brother at that moment. It was frightening to not know at all what was going on.
You know what i really want right now?? i just want for my brother to talk back to me. i just want to see some LIFE in him. I want him to respond to me, to make fun of me, to tell me i'm embarrassing. He has been heavily sedated for the past several days ..the wait is long and painful.. but seeing him is even more painful. I wonder if he's dreaming happy things. I wonder if he's dreaming about me? I don't even know.
So i flew in last night and got to the hospital at about 11 pm...first person i went to see was my brother. Couldn't help it - cried my eyes out when i saw him, cried even harder when the nurse said that we were "looking at a tough situation".
I paced around the floor, reminiscing about my brother and I taking laps around the 7th floor when he was there for leukemia. Then after i had left for school, he would call me and cry on the phone wishing i was there.. but last night i was the one pacing around the floor crying - wondering what would happen in the following days. i would take a lap, stop at my brother's room, then start crying. it was too painful to see my brother like that.
So here i am..waiting waiting waiting.. i wish i KNEW what was gonna happen... i just want to hear the words "improvement" or "normal blood pressure".
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